Researching Therapeutic Interventions in Alzheimer's Care

Mennah Hegazi, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed major in Psychology

In my undergraduate research study, Unlocking Hope: The Efficacy of Therapeutic Interventions in Alzheimer's Care, I had the opportunity to delve into the intricacies of Alzheimer's disease and explore potential non-pharmacological therapies. The study provided a unique lens through which I could understand the limitations of traditional pharmacological approaches and the emerging need for alternative therapies to address the multifaceted challenges posed by this complex condition.

The research process began with an in-depth systematic review of peer-reviewed articles, allowing me to examine various non-pharmacological therapies such as art therapy, reminiscence therapy, physical exercises, cognitive stimulation, and music therapy. This comprehensive analysis highlighted how these interventions can significantly enhance the quality of life for Alzheimer's patients, promoting better daily living activities, cognitive functions, and emotional well-being.

One of the most rewarding aspects of this study was discovering the positive impact of non-pharmacological therapies on both patients and their caregivers. These therapies offer a holistic approach that goes beyond merely managing symptoms; they focus on enhancing the overall well-being of individuals and supporting their emotional and psychological needs. Observing the growing acceptance and implementation of these alternative therapies within the healthcare community was both inspiring and encouraging.

As I progressed through the research, I became more aware of the gaps in existing literature and the need for further evaluations to fully comprehend the complexity of therapeutic options for Alzheimer's disease. This experience underscored the importance of continued research and innovation in this field to develop comprehensive care strategies.

Ultimately, this study reinforced my belief in the potential of non-pharmacological therapies as an effective and affordable approach to optimizing Alzheimer's treatment. It also instilled in me a sense of responsibility to contribute to the ongoing exploration and development of alternative therapies. The experience was not only intellectually stimulating but also deeply meaningful, as it shed light on the potential to unlock hope for Alzheimer's patients and their loved ones.

Capstone: The Art of Creating a Film

Robert Lenza, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed majors in Cinema Studies Production and Psychology 

When I was accepted into Verrazzano Honors at the College of Staten Island, I had no clue what I was going to do for my senior capstone project and what I was going to present at the Undergraduate Research conference (URC). I knew I had interests in film, psychology, and history, but couldn’t put together the picture of what I’d be presenting yet. Throughout my college years taking film classes, I was inspired to create many stories that I wanted to tell through the big screen.

One of those stories was Will, which tells the story of young man suffering from Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) coming face-to-face with his disorder. What I love so much about Will is that it takes a commonly referred to and discussed psychological disorder and tells the story of the inner struggle of the sufferer in a unique way. The OCD is represented as a character within the film through an exact lookalike of the main character.

Being a cinema production major, I chose to have Will be the film for my senior thesis project. It was an ambitious, complex project, so I thought it was the right move in making it my thesis. I had the opportunity to work on new filmmaking techniques and methods, such as the dolly zoom, Dutch angles, voice-over, musical score, as well as lighting and editing experimentation that helped bring my story to life.

Once I decided on Will being the film for my film production thesis, it wasn’t long before I realized using it for my capstone project would be a great idea as well. Not only would it be a good experience for me to present at the URC, but it would also allow a wider population of people to experience a new take on expressing mental health through film.

What separates this project from the other projects I have worked on is just how many people were involved. Prior to this project, I had mainly worked on my films alone or with one or two people. With this project, the list goes on with the number of people that helped out, even if it was just for a limited time.

With that, however, came some struggles. Having many people involved in a celebrative project such as this, it can often be a challenge to stay organized, make schedules, and have a clear, full-focused mind on the goals in the distance. The reality of it all is that filmmaking is not easy, but it’s the experience you get from it that makes it worth it. Yes, there were some low-points, but I learned as much if not more from the low-points as I did the many high-points during the production. This project served as an eye-opener to what it may be like to do this kind of thing as a job one day.

Overall, I can confidently say that this project has better prepared me for the next project that I work on, and I think that is incredibly important because filmmaking is a craft, and there’s always room for improvement. I am grateful that I got to work with so many people, some of whom I had never met before until working on this project. I am really glad I got to make a film that means a lot to me, while also learning new methods and techniques of filmmaking through my technical film production goals.

Afto-Latinx Youth: A review of Literature and Clinical Recommendations

Kelly Calixto, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed major in Psychology

For my final project, I wanted to choose a topic that I was passionate about. Being a Latina of immigrant parents, I knew the hardships Latinos face from society which made me want to shed light on the Afro-Latinx immigrant youth community. My project was a literature review that focused on how discrimination affects the mental health of Afro-Latinx Immigrant Youth Community.

While researching this topic I learned that this community is not only ignored by society, but also in the psychological world. While looking for articles I saw how not many research studies are done on this specific community. Many research studies focus on either Latinos in general or immigrant Latinos, but rarely focus on the Afro Latinx immigrant youth community and how they are affected.

Another thing I learned was how not only discrimination against their race, ethnicity, and legal status affects them, but how the sense of cultural homelessness made this group feel isolated. Many Afro Latinx immigrants suffer from cultural homelessness because of the sense of not belonging. These individuals go through questioning their belonging to their Latin American culture and African culture, as well as adapting to the United States culture.

In this literature review, I created a research suggestion that would assist in identifying how discrimination plays a significant role on mental health for the Afro Latinx immigrant youth community. I also recommended clinical practices such as cross-cultural training and suggesting research outputs in schools for immigrant youth.

This capstone not only educated me on Afro Latinx immigrant community but encouraged me to learn about my growth as a student. When I first began the Verrazzano Honors program and heard of the capstone, I was intimidated and thought that successfully completing the department’s requirements would be unattainable. I realize now that completing the capstone allows me to recognize my growth.

I would like to thank Professor Roger-Sirens for being an amazing mentor throughout this journey. She inspired me to complete my capstone, and shed light on this community after taking her class in the spring semester of 2023. She  continued to push and motivate me throughout this process.

I now aspire to work in minority communities and be the therapist that individuals can feel comfortable relying on.

Meta-Analysis on Emotion Regulation and Language

Nicole Damiani, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed major in Psychology and minor in ASL

I began my capstone during the fall 2022 semester, and familiarized myself with Dr. Patricia Brook’s research lab. I worked as a research assistant, helping graduate students with their studies either by via Zoom and with in-person sessions. I continued in spring 2023 in the lab for independent study credit, and continued working until I found a subject I was interested in. I worked one-on-one with a graduate student, Elizabeth Che, and the topic of our research was investigating the role that developmental language disorder (DLD) has on emotion recognition, understanding, and regulation within both DLD and non-DLD children. We decided to conduct a meta-analysis, a huge combination of research papers all analyzed and extracted into one paper. We extracted data from each study to obtain raw numbers for our figures.

I began writing my honors thesis in fall 2023, meeting with Liz and/or Patty every Monday via Zoom or in-person. We would set goals for the week which kept me on track, and I would spend hours every weekend on my paper. At the end of March 2024, my thesis was approved so I could obtain honors in the major of Psychology. The journey was not finished yet, as I also began my poster for the Undergraduate Research Conference (URC) on May 2^nd.

My paper will eventually be submitted for publication, which means that I am still updating my work. Overall, I am grateful I have experienced working on an honors thesis. I believe that this was a major reason I have been accepted into one of CSI’s very selective graduate programs. While I do not plan on pursuing research in the future, my experience has been a rewarding and unique opportunity.

The Happiness of Chinese Immigration in the United States: Past, Present, and Future

Giselle Chen, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed major in Psychology & Philosophy

As a child of immigrant parents, I often find myself wondering if my parents are satisfied and content with their lives. My father immigrated to the United States of America long before I was born. He had to temporarily say goodbye to my mother and older sister who were living back home in a small village called Taishan of Guangdong, China. Eventually, my mother and older sister joined my father in the U.S., and then I was born. When I was born, my family had to take me back to China so my uncle and aunt could take care of me while my family worked hard to be financially stable.

Growing up, we lived in a cramped basement. I was often ashamed of the living conditions and envied my classmates that lived in single-family private homes. In order to make a bit more money, my mom and I would collect cans and recycle them for five cents each. I always found myself embarrassed to be seen in public by my classmates. I would be embarrassed to bring dumplings to elementary school because my classmates found it stinky. While my older sister had to learn English at 11-years-old, I was trying to retain my parents’ native language, Taishanese.

Now at 22 years old, I understand that my parents were doing their best to always ensure that my siblings and I had a roof over our heads, full stomachs, clothes to wear, and resilience—even if it meant detracting from their own happiness. At 22 years old, I still see Chinese elders rummaging through the trash cans of Chinatown to collect recycling cans.

Professor Stephen Morris’ senior seminar course on the nature of happiness inspired me to develop my capstone on the experience of Chinese immigrants in the U.S., and how immigration has impacted their happiness and life-satisfaction. It is established that a high level of life-satisfaction is positively correlated to education and income. Typically, on average, Asian Americans tend to have higher levels of education and income. Therefore, they should also have higher life-satisfaction and be happier. But this was not the case, and I was very interested and determined to investigate why this was the case.

During my research, a consistent finding in over 33 studies was that Asian Americans significantly score lower on life-satisfaction when compared to European Americans, but did not significantly differ to Asian populations. This was due to a combination of both cultural values and a myriad of factors due to immigration. These factors included income, education, discrimination, acculturation stress, collectivism, and acculturation gaps between different generations.

Moving forward, immigration itself (no matter the nationality or ethnicity) is a complex and multifaceted phenomenon, with a long and rich history. Regardless of one’s political or personal beliefs, it is important to remember that immigrants too are human beings. To understand and to heal is to see beyond what we have experienced and what we have known throughout our lives.

 

 

 

           

 

A Reflection on The Miseducation of Cameron Post and the Harms of Conversion Therapy

Hunter Guttenplan, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed major in Psychology and minors in English Literature and Political Science

My capstone project was about the negative effects of conversion therapy and how it is portrayed in The Miseducation of Cameron Post by Emily M. Danforth, as well as research on how the portrayal of conversion therapy in the novel relates to conversion therapy in the United States.

I learned a lot about conversion therapy with the assistance of my former English Professor, Harry Thorne. I took his Coming of Age Narratives class, and we read a book called The Miseducation of Cameron Post. The novel immediately captivated me. Reading a young adult novel about mental health and psychotherapy was very enjoyable, especially as a Psychology major. The novel was so enjoyable that I knew it was exactly what I wanted to do for my capstone project. I could combine two of my academic interests, English and Psychology.

The results I found in the research were actually exactly as I expected. The representation of the oppression of people with queer identities in The Miseducation of Cameron Post was supported by real-world statistics. I learned a lot about Gender Dysphoria, therapeutic interventions in relation to conversion therapy, the fact that people in the LGBTQIA+ community are eight times more likely to report having attempted suicide, almost six times more likely to report high levels of depression, more than three times as likely to use illegal drugs, and are three times more likely to be at high risk of HIV and other STDs. I also learned about the public opinion in the United States regarding conversion therapy, and the influence of negative beliefs and clinical competence on Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual individuals.

One of the most interesting parts in my opinion was the high economic burden of conversion therapy. To be more precise, that economic burden is about nine billion dollars, which is outrageous.

If I were to continue developing this project, I would research the difference in conversion therapy throughout the years, as well as look at countries other than the United States. That way I can broaden my research on the issue since it doesn’t just apply to our country. I would also look at the difference in how conversion therapy was done throughout the decades. For example, I assume that conversion therapy was done differently in 1975 than it is now, especially due to the fact that homosexuality was not as socially acceptable back then as it is now.

It was a pleasure to work on this project under the guidance of Professor Thorne, and it was a rewarding experience doing this capstone project for the Verrazzano Honors Program.

 

Perspective Shifts: Understanding Both Sides of Growth with Psychology

 Food Taang Zheng Gimenez, Verrazzano Class of 2024, completed major in Psychology and minor in Spanish

Throughout the challenging journey of completing my capstone, I held onto the expectation of a seamless and timely conclusion, balancing the myriad responsibilities associated with graduation, my job, and other commitments. Navigating this intricate web of tasks not only taught me time management but also instilled in me the importance of resilience. Juggling these responsibilities compelled me to master the art of not just meeting deadlines but doing so with a keen sense of quality and precision. In terms of personal growth, I learned effective time management and discovered the invaluable skill of recognizing when to pause and recharge during moments of saturation. As I worked on this project alongside my mentor, the depth of my academic exploration expanded.

The journey was not just about completing a capstone; it was a transformative process where I acquired my ability to sift through vast amounts of information, distinguishing between what was essential and what was not. The effort that I set not only improved the solidity of my papers but also elevated my approach to academic research, ensuring a more comprehensive understanding of the materials vital for my education and my capstone. This journey showed me that challenges are not just hurdles but opportunities for growth and refinement.

My capstone revolves around the topic of bullying. Initially, I attempted to focus on the victims, but considering the abundance of research in that area, I decided to take a different approach and shifted my focus to explore the perspective of the bully.

To be honest, I harbored negative feelings towards bullies, influenced by my proximity to individuals who were victims of those situations. However, as I researched for this capstone, my perspective underwent a complete transformation. I now see this as a significant personal growth journey. The title of my Capstone is, “Bullying, Factors and Rehabilitation: The Perspective from the Bully and the Factors that Can Contribute to Bullying”.

With my major of Psychology, I aspire to become a School Counselor, and this capstone has immensely broadened my understanding, emphasizing the importance of considering both sides of the bullying dynamic. It has become a valuable addition to my knowledge base, providing insights that will undoubtedly shape my future role in guiding and supporting individuals.

Collaborating with Professor Valkiria Duran-Narucki, I not only gained the skills to analyze data, construct more precise arguments, and critically examine academic articles, but also discovered the transformative impact of mentorship. Professor Narucki's guidance extended beyond the technicalities of my capstone, providing insights into the broader landscape of academic and professional growth. The mentor-student dynamic was not just about receiving instructions; it became a dialogue that enriched my perspectives and fostered intellectual curiosity.

This experience underscored the crucial role that mentorship plays in shaping not only academic endeavors but also personal and professional development. It reaffirmed the belief that having a mentor like her is an investment in one's journey, offering not just guidance but a supportive partnership that propels you toward your goals.

Studying Verbal Development with Tajik Children

 Nada Haikel, Verrazzano Class of 2023, completed major in Psychology & minor in Biology

 As a psychology student, I have always had an interest in child development. When I first came across the flyer for Dr. Karasik’s research lab, I figured it would be an interesting addition to my curriculum during my final year of undergraduate studies. Not only was it an intriguing culture and development research lab, but it also meant I wouldn’t have to take an extra class to complete my degree.

As I joined the lab and learned about the several ongoing projects Dr. Karasik had been working on, I quickly found myself interested in one regarding Tajik infants interacting with a novel toy in a longitudinal study. Working with several graduate and undergraduate students, we coded and discussed data until we completed the project in a matter of weeks.

Although I spent a majority of the first semester of my final year working on this project, it’s not what I decided to use for my capstone. Using the same data set, we developed more questions including the ones used for my capstone. Rather than looking at the development of Tajik children, we looked at the verbal information given by the mothers of the infants during this particularly challenging task.

When the time came to submit my capstone abstract, I remember panicking and not knowing what to write for a one-page double-spaced abstract on a project I had been working on for nearly two semesters. With a few encouraging words from Cheryl, I pushed through and finally submitted my abstract.

Looking back, it really shouldn’t have been that hard to write. After all, psychology majors don’t write 10-page papers to then get stuck on writing just one page. I am grateful for the experiences that I’ve had doing research with an incredible group of people and the having the best moral support system.

Effectiveness of Medications on Affective Disorders

Krystle Chapple, Verrazzano Honors Class of 2023, completed major in Medical Laboratory Science, with minors in ASL, Biochemistry, and Psychology

My capstone idea began when I took a spring 2018 class, Cognitive Psychology, taught by Dr. Daniel Kaplin. It was interesting and informative, and was and still is one of my favorite classes.
The timing happened to be at a crossroads when my partner was dealing with depression. He had been given many medications, but none of them worked. He wasn’t the only one. Many people I knew who took antidepressants shared with me how ineffective they were. I thought that was interesting as this happened to be one of the topics in my class at the time, and something clicked for me after learning the material. I mentioned it to my professor who was very excited by my idea and urged me to explore it.
With his help, I did some digging and we found that this idea had merit. I came up with a possible reason why antidepressants are not effective for so many people and my professor suggested it might make for a good research review. I held onto that idea for years and I was so glad that I got to do it for my capstone.
I learned so much about what goes into writing a research review, which involves a lot of reading. I must have read well over one hundred research papers. As a consequence, I learned a lot more about the topic I was writing about. It was very exciting to find that after all of my reading, my idea still held up.
I think one of the most valuable things my mentor taught me was how to organize. There were so many papers and so much information. They gave me a base to work off of and I also developed my own methods for keeping all the information organized. I used an Excel spreadsheet to track my papers and did the citations right away so that at the end I didn't have to go crazy hunting and creating citations. This was the best decision I could have made. This paper had more citations than any paper I’ve ever written but it took me the least amount of time.
My experience writing this research review has been an invaluable experience. One thing I’ve taken away from CSI is that I enjoy research and I want to continue doing research in my career. This was a great step in teaching me what goes into writing formal academic papers for this field and the skills I’ve learned here will continue to serve me.

Impact of COVID-19 on Mental Health

Kyle Hapuarachchi, Verrazzano Class of 2023, completed major in Biology Health Science Science 

When thinking about my capstone, I knew I wanted to work with Psychology and how the mental health in the U.S. differs to the mental health of third world countries. With some adaptation and the help of my mentor Professor Sukhram, we came up with the idea of the impact of COVID-19 on the mental health of both college students and frontline healthcare workers (FHCWs).

My purpose in doing this research was to ensure that the mental health issues that arose during the pandemic would be mitigated in the case of another mental health crisis.

In order to do this narrative review in a structured way, I looked at four different studies. Two of the studies dealt with CUNY students that had mental health issues, while the other two studies were about frontline healthcare workers and their struggles with mental health during and after the COVID-19 pandemic.

I think recognizing the areas that make for poor mental health is important to understand. As a CUNY student and someone who wants to work in the healthcare field, it is important to understand the potential mental health crises I may be working in.

With the help of Professor Sukhram and the Writing Center, I was able to write an insightful narrative review that explained the importance of looking at mental health issues due to COVID-19. My mentor assisted me with similar peer-reviewed articles to read since I had been unsure on what to do and how to format my paper. This allowed me to get used to another version of writing reports; it was a completely new ballgame. Understanding the difference between facts and opinion was something that I had to get accustomed to. 

Overall, working on this project showed me that although things are tough in the beginning there is a light at the end of the tunnel in which you will find success. 

 

The Inside Coming Out: The History of Psychology Through Art Movements

 Lorianna Fernandez, Verrazzano Class of 2022, completed major in Art and minor in Psychology 

 

The time creating my capstone was filled with long days, long nights, self-doubt, short bursts where I felt confident in my work, and a very hard lesson in the utilization of proper ventilation using oil paints and solvents.

This process really made it pertinent that I had to get into the mindset of an artist of a certain movement. It had to go a step beyond simply imitating, to get the structure and elements across. It helped me as an artist figure out my own personal style and see my commonalities among the paintings, as well as things I felt uncomfortable with or would not do in my own work. I also gained an even deeper understanding of how psychology affects art and how the two are so similar.

In my psychology and art classes, I am always shocked at the polarizing amount of people who are involved in studying both avenues, some in hopes to combine them as a career, so it was charming to see that they have always been closely tied to each other.

If this topic was going to be further researched, there could definitely be more art movements incorporated. There are thousands of niche art movements dating from the Renaissance to now, and a lot of significant events in the realm of psychology that could be discussed. There could be a much lengthier introspection of artists in each movement and investigating their own personal lives and how their art movement reflects that as well as the significant trends in psychology at their time. I feel like this would be a very interesting look into the artists that we are familiar with but also ones we have not heard of yet. This was overall a really interesting and personally stimulating project and I am happy about everything I could take away from it.

 

Researching Infants Developmental Abilities

 Haley Essig, Verrazzano Class of 2022, completed major in Psychology and minor in ASL 

I've always been interested in research as a Psychology major. During my junior year, I worked as a research assistant in the Child Development Lab with Dr. Berger, who supported and guided me throughout my journey. With my interest in psychology and desire to work with children, I thought this would be ideal. We were curious to see if and how an infants' ability to sit affected their ability to focus their attention because they mastered both abilities throughout the second half of their first year.

To accomplish this, we observed multiple 6–8-month old infants as they explored toys, either supported (in a high-chair) or independently (while sitting on the floor). This study was carried out online, with parents using a webcam or phone camera to record their children's focused attention and sitting ability. We instructed the parent to give three toys to the infant for 90 seconds at a time and observe how they explored. 

For the first two semesters, we collected data and coded it for interpretation. During the third semester, I collaborated with graduate students on the manuscript and worked on my capstone project. This project was difficult at times, but I believe the payoff was well worth it. I'd previously studied motor development in my psychology classes but becoming a participant in that study was a whole different experience. I thought it would be a good idea to include these ideas into my capstone project, as I was already drafting the manuscript alongside a fellow graduate student. 

Finding a means to explain the facts and make it understandable to an outside audience was the most challenging aspect of the capstone, and I am grateful for the increased knowledge and experience I gained. My mentors and classmates were supportive and helpful in the process of guiding me through my research and writing my capstone. I had many moments of doubt, worry, and fear about whether I would be able to complete this task. Despite all these difficult emotions, this project is one of the things I am most proud of from my undergraduate years. It piqued my interest and curiosity, taught me perseverance, and helped me gain knowledge in the fields of psychology and motor development.

 

Pediatric Research Leads to Interest in Pursuing OT

 Michelle Puma, Verrazzano Class of 2022, completed major in Psychology 

When I first started thinking of my capstone research, I thought I had it figured out. In my sophomore year, I was interested in physical therapy as a career and had planned ahead to do research related to that field. In the fall of 2019 I was lucky enough to have a mentor guide me in researching the effect of vascular endothelial growth factor on spinal cord injured mice. By the spring of 2020 most labs were closed in-person due to the pandemic, but I continued on with my research. I presented at the Undergraduate Conference and thought the hard part was over; I just needed to write my research paper.

Time passed, and I was in my senior year preparing to write my paper when unfortunately, my mentor was not available to help. This was a major setback considering I had completed most of the work. However, Cheryl helped me create a different capstone proposal that related to my passion of working with children with disabilities.

My idea for career paths has shifted since taking several elective classes for my Disability Studies minor. Understanding the bio-psycho social aspect of having a disability and the contextual factors that hinder the activities that are meaningful to someone with a disability has led to my interest in pursuing occupational therapy.

Cheryl connected me with Dr. Amanda Rotondo who had previous research in pediatrics. Dr. Rotondo was so helpful and accommodating. So much so, that writing a new topic didn’t seem as stressful anymore. I was able to work with her on the effect of disruption in continuation of PT/OT providers for children with disabilities.

After conducting this research, I gained a deeper understanding of the two professions, and understand how personal and environmental factors are considered when a person with a disability regresses in particular skills.

Potentials Reached through Research and Presenting

 Marina Abdalla, Verrazzano Class of 2022, completed major in Psychology and minor in Biology

One of my biggest accomplishments at the College of Staten Island was being a research assistant in a research lab. I was fortunate enough to participate in a Child Development research lab that is co-run by Dr. Sarah Berger and Dr. Lana Karasik. Without them, I would have not been granted the opportunity to work on my capstone project and work with children, even though it was virtually. My dream has been to work with children, whether it would be a doctor or something else in the medical/healthcare field. Being able to instruct parents to teach their infants how to safely descend stairs to avoid injury left a huge impact on my goal. Watching the infants’ ability to strategize and listen to their parents’ advice taught me how smart infants can be even though they are so young! I realized their motor potentials and problem-solving abilities when coding their behavior.

One thing I am not the best at is technology. When I started coding it was difficult because so many things were happening at once that I needed to focus on and note. On many occasions, the app crashed on me, which made me have to start a coding session over again as my hours of work were lost. Even though I had saved my work, it was still disappeared. Although it became exceedingly difficult for me to maintain my motivation to continue, it taught me how to work around the app and discover ways that could make coding much easier and consistent for me.

I am also not the best at presenting. I have the worst stage fright and I get extremely nervous. When I was able to talk to someone beforehand about the presentation, having the motivation and ambition to work on my fear put me in a better spot.

I have had the best experience with my advisors here at CSI that believed in me, when I myself could not. It also prepared me for possible presentations in the future, so for that I will forever be thankful to them for a wonderful time during my undergraduate experience. 

Neurodiversity and Self Reflection

 Sergey Shevchuk-Hill, Verrazzano Class of  2021, completed major in Psychology, and minor in English Linguistics 

It feels impossible to describe my capstone experience in any number of pages or words. It feels like it was an eternity ago when I was eagerly looking for opportunities to do clinical research that would help me get into one of oh-so many competitive Clinical Psychology Ph.D. programs. It is strange to think that it was only about two years ago that I approached Dr. Kristen Gillespie-Lynch about doing an independent study with her.

Going into the conversation, I felt a little hesitant. I have ADHD and I was aware that there was some overlap between ADHD and autism in some of the causes as well as in some of the experiences. So, in part, I was worried that I might be entering an oppressive power structure, where I, along with other researchers, would look down smugly onto the “subjects” and make notes regarding their behaviors, in attempts to “solve the puzzle” of autism. That could not be further from reality.

I was very excited when I learned that Kristen’s lab aimed to conduct participatory research through the lens of neurodiversity. Neurodiversity was a concept that I was only marginally familiar with. At the time, I saw the concept as saying that my existence was valid. It seemed to say that when I was in 3rd grade (in Russia) and my classmates said that they could kill me and no one would care because “one idiot more, one idiot less,” or when my teachers graded me based on how fast I could perform on a test rather than how well, and when they chastised me for my infrequent attendance which was caused by me having been bullied and faced with unfair expectations, neurodiversity said that they were wrong. It seemed to say that I was indeed not broken, and that I could amount to something. As such, my hesitation was replaced with eagerness and excitement.

During the two years I spent conducting research with Kristen, I learned more about the concept of neurodiversity, and the disability rights movement surrounding it. I found that I very much agreed with the movement’s goal of opposing those that sought to “cure” neurodivergence, and instead seeking interventions that focus on genuinely improving one’s quality of life as well as changing society to be more accepting of those who are different.

This research also inspired me to take related classes and earn the Advanced Certificate in Autism instead of a second minor. The information I came across in the classes as well as while researching led me to do a lot of self-reflection. For one, I learned about the association between being neurodivergent and identifying as LGBTQ+, including the higher likelihood of being trans, as well as identifying as non-binary. One qualitative research paper I read talked about the experiences of autistic people with gender, and mentioned a non-binary autistic person describe that they never internalized the subtle social messages through which we tend to be taught gender and provided with particular expectations.

That experience resonated with me a lot. Even though I learned as a child how to put on a mask and pretend that my assigned gender roles fit me perfectly for fear of being bullied, I never felt that I fit the mold. This knowledge helped me become more comfortable with my identity, and to become comfortable asking people to acknowledge it in the language they use to talk about me, as well as leading me to stop suppressing it within myself.

So, the last two years were a time of immense personal growth for me, and I feel that my outlook on life is extremely different now than it was two years ago. In my last two years, the world has also changed drastically, and seemingly overnight, bringing with it new horrors as well as new opportunities. And great changes happened in my life, as I got engaged and married to the most wonderful person. As such, it is a little difficult to remember what my life was like before starting my capstone.