A Love of Alice in Wonderland

Danielle Cabanas, Verrazzano Class of 2021, completed major in English Writing 

Most people are familiar with Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, or the techni-color Disney film about a ditsy blonde who falls down a rabbit hole. Alice not only represented the Victorian child’s condition, but the condition of people and children everywhere, regardless of the period.

Ever since I first watched the Disney film, I have wanted to be Alice. I have dressed as Alice for Halloween multiple times and I will probably do it again. I will always want to be Alice. What more could a girl want? Tea-time, talking animals wearing cute outfits, nothing making any sense, a pretty blue dress. On the outside, Alice in Wonderland has had many interpretations due to its many representations across all media. However, my intrigue with Alice has only grown over time, along with my collection of AIW memorabilia, tchotchkes, and tattoos. With my Capstone project, I finally had a productive place to channel this obsession and explore my ideas about Alice, her childhood, and how Carroll composed the novel I grew to know and love.

“Why is a raven like a writing desk?”, “What can you catch but not throw?”, “What are left behind when they are taken?” These and more make up some of the riddles from Lewis Carroll’s novel. This book has been so life changing for me, and has meant so much to me growing up that I knew I wanted to include it in my studies somehow. When the time came for me to decide what I wanted my capstone project to be about, Alice was the first book that popped into my mind.

The novel was first given to me as a gift from my godmother for my 3rd birthday. However, I first read it in Miss Mezz’s 8th grade English class at I.S. 61. I remember the chocolate brown cover of the Penguin Books edition of the novel, the edges of its spine white from years of opening and closing its pages. The book and the story have withstood the test of time. As I got older, I started to think about the novelty of the story, how difficult it must have been for a grown man to write from the point of view of a young, wealthy, girl-child; all things Carroll was not. My continued admiration for Alice is what sparked my ideas about the real Alice and what encouraged me to continue my research further into the Victorian Era and Lewis Carroll himself.

Why was I so obsessed with this girl and Wonderland? I realized I had the answer the whole time. I was trying to escape my own reality much like Alice escaped hers, which is something we all wish we could do every once in a while. I took this concept and read the novel obsessively, because I felt like I was onto something with the floating ideas about Alice, escapism, Lewis Carroll, and Victorian Childhood.

One of my biggest struggles while writing this essay was trying to bring all of my thoughts together into one, cohesive body of writing that not only made sense, but conveyed my message clearly and concisely. I realized that writing something you're passionate about can be very difficult, because sometimes your thoughts can develop a mind of their own. I relied on my mentor, Professor Lara Saguisag, to steer my thoughts back into the right direction.

My Capstone taught me that you really can do anything you set your mind to. I wanted to write about something that I loved that also fit in with my future career plans, and of course, the Verrazzano capstone requirement. What began as something I felt was mediocre, turned into something where I could research and compile my own educated thoughts and ideas, and create something that was not only thought provoking, but also critical and analytical.

I am so proud of my capstone, and I am proud that I was able to put forth a body of work that not only represents my educational journey at CSI, but also represents who I am as a person. This body of work also represents the beginning of my career into Children’s Publishing, where I look forward to conducting more research on children’s novels and the representation of childhood in literature throughout history.