Lessons Learned from Confucianism and Daoism

 Kayla Forminio, Verrazzano Class of 2023, completing major in SLS with a minor in Psychology

In SLS 301 Humanities I: Ancient Cultures, I learned about the philosophy of Confucianism, which emerged in China during the sixth century B.C.E. It was founded by Confucius, who is recognized as China’s first great teacher. His most notable students, known as his disciples, put together a collection of aphorisms attributed to Confucius, known as The Analects. This text explores Confucius’ beliefs on the importance of virtues such as the social self and ritual in self-cultivation, and connects to my personal time  frame and culture.

One of the aphorisms in The Analects states, “The Master said, ‘To one who is not eager I do not reveal anything, nor do I explain anything to one who is not communicative. If I raise one corner for someone and he cannot come back with the other three, I do not go on.” This passage came to mind while I was tutoring. Sometimes the student who I work with can be a bit stubborn when it comes to completing his homework assignments. Recently he said to me, “I don’t want to do this anymore,” and after trying to grab his attention multiple times, I took a step back and said: “Okay, should I leave?” Although this was difficult to do because I did not want to come off as mean, it was practical and put Confucian ideals into play. I was surprised to see that once I responded that way, he changed his mind and said, “Fine, let’s do it.” This made me see teaching differently. Sometimes, you may have to allow a student’s drive for learning to develop independently rather than pushing them too hard.

I feel that this passage is relevant to now. As humans, we offer our fullest to others, especially when we see can see that they are struggling. But, sometimes, people do not want to be helped and wish to be left alone. Instead of chasing after them, we can think like Confucius: Why help someone who does not want to be helped? Maybe this way, we will not stress as much, and the person may come to us naturally.

I also learned about the philosophy of Daoism, which follows the poem-like text known as The Daodejing, written by philosopher Laozi. It teaches the way of life known as the Dao, and believes in the principle wuwei, or acting effortlessly. For example, achieving good results by not  acting or doing something follows wuwei. Personally, last year I struggled with my stamina in running. I would look at my phone every second to see that I had only ran a quarter of a mile, then a half of a mile, then three-quarters of a mile. This only hurt me because I was focusing on hitting a mile-mark so much that I did not focus on the actual power of running. I decided to stop checking my progress and after a few weeks of not looking, I hit three miles without even knowing it. I can associate these two philosophies with how I live my life and what changes I can make to grow as a person.